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Friday, July 31, 2009












Written by Martha Hopler

…wonder and discovery continue…look at my initial 'matryoshka writings' in the February post. Read my writings as an unfolding process - February’s blogpost folds into July’s…

Discovering the celebration of the mother-daughter relationship by looking at the matryoshka dolls, continues to be a source of my wonder. These dolls carry history, have a nesting ability (at times they are called nesting dolls) and each are uniquely decorated to tell a story.

I am fascinated by what it means to explore the invitation to celebrate a relationship that is both difficult and complex. The history of the matryoshka doll was originally painted and copied from Japanese dolls. The idea that the doll itself was taken from another culture, suggests that there is meaning in the history of its creation; one culture copies from another in creating its own story.

These dolls have become a symbol of the work Hillary and I do in the therapeutic setting. The goal of this work we are embarking upon is not only to explore relationship issues, but also to create a space that invites the celebration of the complexity of the mother-daughter relationship. The nesting dolls symbolize this complex, interconnected space, felt in the action of taking the dolls apart and also putting them back together. As women, are we not like this at times? We look like one “I am” – standing alone. But when we open up our stories and our lives, one discovers what is within - whether it is our mother and her relationship to a daughter, or sisters to sisters, or a friend to a friend. The “within-ness” begins the conversation where we are speaking of relationships and those who we know and want to be known by. The opening up can be a difficult process that initially takes time.

The beauty and the story of the dolls are hidden until someone takes the time to open and discover all seven or so dolls. When they are all lined up one can see from tallest to smallest a story that someone took time to paint on each and every doll.

The question becomes, as women, can I really know me and who I am if I have not taken the time to look at the long line of other women who are in my story? As women we all stand on our own while being interconnected.